The price of happiness

So far in my reading of Dan Harris's book, 10% Happier, I have come to the conclusion that he's a bit of a prick. However, I'm starting to kind of like the guy. For starters, many of his thoughts on success and happiness resonate with me. Prior to meditation, Dan sees his happiness as a measurement of how many stories he is able to report on, and defines the price of security as insecurity. Following meditation, he begins to see that his initial thoughts are not aligned with his studies on Buddhism. His mentor, Mark Epstein, debunks his security and insecurity mantra, noting that everything in life is impermanent, and that true happiness comes from within. He also goes on to talk about how many people feel seek to find their happiness based on obtaining something in the future are bound to never actually achieve true happiness. 

I find this to be absolutely enlightening. As someone who always ties achievement to happiness (when I get that promotion, or my masters, lose 10 lbs) I was living in the future rather than finding ways to be happy in the present.  We live in a culture of entitlement, where social media like Instagram and Pinterest presents us daily with a set of people we strive to be like, to look like, to have what they have. We feel unhappy because much of what they have is unattainable for most of us. We buy things that we believe will make us happy, only to discover the feeling of "happiness" passes with time. In trying to learn more about why this happens, I learned that what we're feeling when we obtain the thing we believe will make us happy is actually not happiness at all. Instead what we're feeling is actually just a lack of desire, a feeling of contentment. As soon as we want for something new, the feeling of discontentment and a new desire appears in its place.

So what does this mean? This means that happiness does not actually have a price. That it is possible to be happy with ourselves and what we have at any current moment. Reading 10% Happier has taught me to focus less on material possessions as a source of happiness (since those are impermanent) and to focus more on the people and environment I'm in for that moment. In addition, this book has taught me that people are also impermanent, and to take the time to enjoy spending time with them while we can. So really, what I've discovered that the price of happiness is spending the time with the people and things you already have in that very moment without focusing as much on the future or being stuck the past.